How to become happy without him. How to be happy every day. Happy and without a man

- Tell me, this is my first time in this city, does this tram go to the station?
- Yes.
- So I sat down correctly?
- Yes. Only now he’s going in the other direction, so you can at least sit facing there.

M. Zhvanetsky

We have already talked about joy. Remember the exercises “I please myself”, “I please myself in a new way”? Remember the piggy bank of joys that opened on Victory Day?

It's a pity that we didn't put much into it. I expected more. Don't we know how to rejoice? Have you forgotten how?

Aren't you, like many other women (and men too, but we're not talking about them now) waiting for happiness to finally turn to you? If you're waiting, I want to tell you this: most people are unhappy because they have misconceptions about happiness. They think, they are even sure that some outstanding event is about to happen and they will become happy. Do you think so too?

One of my friends, to whom I recently told that I was happy, asked me: “What happened?” How should I answer such a question? I don’t know... If the question is put incorrectly, I don’t know how to answer it.

Once upon a time I also thought: in order to be happy, something big had to happen in my life. Something wonderful.

At first I thought that when I became big and went to school, a new, wonderful and happy life would begin. Then I thought (it’s funny to think about it now) that I needed to join the Pioneers - the Pioneers with red ties around their necks seemed very happy to me. Then I thought that I needed to finish school - and then happiness would certainly come to me. Finish college... Marry for love... Give birth to a child... A good job - can there be happiness in it? Your own apartment? Car? What else needs to happen in my life for me to be happy????

Now I know for sure: you can have all the treasures of the world, have a wonderful family, a job - and still NOT FEEL HAPPY! I'm even going to explain it to you in one of the next newsletters. WHY this is impossible.

Happiness comes with THE ABILITY TO PLEASE YOURSELF. Great, even enormous happiness is just many, many small joys plus the ABILITY to rejoice.

Most people, fruitlessly expecting that happiness will suddenly turn its face towards them, go through life - as in Zhvanetsky’s apt joke - in the opposite direction from happiness. And they don’t even turn their faces to where happiness lives. Alas.

You know, a wonderful psychologist, Ayurvedic specialist on family happiness, Ruslan Narushevich, has prepared a gift for you (and me too): a list of 69 pleasant things that a woman can and should do to be happy. If you do these things, life will become more pleasant and joyful - I guarantee it!

In addition to the list, Ruslan conducted as many as 5 (!) programs on Ayurveda radio, in which he explained in detail not only WHAT a woman should do, but also HOW and WHY.

Ruslan spoke about the differences in male and female psychology, and about why a man can make a woman HAPPIER, but cannot make her HAPPY.

I highly recommend that you look at the list and listen to the recordings. They are available online COMPLETELY FREE! And the title of the series of programs is so magnificent: How and why to become happy without men!

To receive a gift you just need to go here:

My advice to you: record the audio on your player. This is very practical given the current eternal lack of time. Then you can listen to the recordings anywhere: on the beach by the sea, weeding the garden beds at the dacha, in public transport, in a traffic jam, in line at a store or hairdresser. You will be able to spend useful and enjoyable time that was previously lost for you.

Here I present a brief summary of the lectures “How to become happy without the help of men” or “How to become happy yourself and then allow yourself to be made even happier by a loved one, a man” by psychologist, Vedic astrologer - Ruslan Narushevich. If you want to listen to these lectures, here is the link www.audioveda.ru/ I admire his talent, knowledge and manner of conveying them to the audience.

How to become a strong and happy woman?

According to the Vedas, we live in Kali Yuga - the age of strife and divorce. Therefore, there is no point in hoping that marriages will survive on their own. They say that “hope dies last.” And it is right. The one who hopes dies first. Need to do something. It remains to understand what exactly.

We live in very high tension and stress. There is more than enough stress. Our body is adapted to experience stress only for a short time - the whole body is mobilized, becomes active, we are better oriented and ultimately save ourselves. But if you are in a state of stress for several years, the body can no longer stand it. Often women try to reduce stress through male activities - for example, going to work or business. But lunar energy is found only in informal relationships. Only if a woman has internal sources of happiness, she is able to relieve stress from her husband, even from the entire family at critical moments, with her calmness, light, simply by her presence, and restore a man’s faith in himself. But for this to happen, by the time of “hard times” she must already be “charged” with happiness, so that she can “cool” the man’s psyche, relieve him of exhaustion and overheating

A woman's strength is that she is happy. And during periods of calm, she should use every opportunity to charge herself with happiness. And no matter how much happiness a woman accumulates, she will not be able to spend it entirely on herself. It is in her nature to be happy to serve. And if she serves from an exhausted state, then nothing good will come of it. She must share the excess of happiness. If she is unhappy, then she begins to beat her happiness out of her close people and, first of all, from her husband and children.

For a man, the more stress, the more efficiency he feels from his activities (of course, there is a limit to everything, but to a certain extent this is true). A man is energized in action when he feels valuable, important, needed.

Therefore, what will be written below may seem like complete selfishness to you, but this is the only way to save the family.

This knowledge may be difficult to perceive, since the upbringing that hammered and crushed the woman has already been ingrained into the bone marrow. But if you practice this knowledge, it can really make you happy. A woman should know what can make her happy, but often she simply forgets about her desires. How can other people find out about this if she herself doesn’t know?

A woman just needs to experiment herself, try what she likes best. Sometimes she may start going to yoga and suddenly realize that she has vocal abilities.

There are women whose self-esteem has fallen so low, her dissatisfaction is so high that she cannot even fulfill any of the points listed below. A woman cannot be made happy from being unhappy. She must know herself what she wants in order to become happy and be sure to express it in an adequate form to her man. And if her wishes come true, thank her and let her know that she has become happier. Thus, cooperate with a man. A man cannot resist the fact that his woman becomes happy, he will support her in every possible way.

It is not enough for a woman to receive love only from children (this means “drinking their blood”) if she herself lacks love. She then, with her care, simply obliges the child to give her his love.

Before starting a partnership, you need to “fill the honeycomb of love” with honey, receive and store love. Until the age of 7, this is the unconditional love of parents, when they love for nothing, even if the child makes mistakes. From 7 to 14 - a person receives the love of friends, loved ones, chatting about nothing, sometimes doing complete nonsense, playing games - just to be together, to communicate. The love of like-minded people is when a person feels that his ideas are valued, they are important, and they listen to him with interest. The 4th type of love is self-sufficiency. And only when these honeycombs are filled is a person able to fully enter into partnerships. When he (s) is filled with love, he (s) does not expect anything in return for his love. Otherwise, the family simply turns into a business.

A woman must be independent of a man (independent in the sense that a woman is able to give her love to her husband even when she does not receive love from him. That is, not depend on whether a man gives her love or not). If a woman lives only as a man, gives her whole life to him, and God forbid he gets another woman, then her psyche cannot stand it. It is very rare for families to survive such an ordeal. But if a wife is charged with happiness, then she can easily overcome crises.

It often happens that a woman still has enough psychic energy for crises, but after the “end of the war” she realizes that she has nothing left to give, because the energy has not been replenished - and this is where everything collapses. So while there are no tests, a woman needs to replenish herself with lunar energies.

The point is not what a woman makes of these points, but what she considers herself worthy of. Start at least small, gradually appetites begin to grow. It is important to realize the importance and necessity of doing these things. We need to get into this.

If a girl believes that she is engaged in spiritual practice, but at the same time she has neglected herself, then this is not spiritual practice. True spiritual practice makes a woman worthy of all these wonderful things. Increasing lunar energy increases a woman's loyalty and honesty. What keeps a woman married is the belief that this man can make her happy. The man’s “bank of trust” increases - that is, if a man makes any mistakes, then the higher the deposit in this bank, the easier he can make them. Lunar beauty increases with age, a woman becomes more attractive, stocking up on this energy.

For comparison, List of qualities that increase stress resistance in men:

(Resistance to stress means that we can tolerate all sorts of troubles)

1. Setting goals

2. Healthy competition

3. Opportunities, time, privacy to solve the problem

4. The mood of the “rely on me” type, that is, when someone simply unconditionally relies on him, trusts him

5. Risk

6. Danger

7. Inclination, the right to dominate (if a woman gives a man such a right)

8. Success, efficiency

9. Money. Having money as a means of solving problems.

10. A clear understanding of the start and end time of the project being dealt with. Achieving some result in a certain time, seeing where the finish line is (women can do something endlessly)

11. Power or influence.

That is, there are factors that strengthen a man’s resistance to stress in business and at work.

And now the Qualities that increase a woman’s resistance to stress (not what makes her persistent and ascetic, but happy, what increases her feminine energy, strengthens the family)

1. The ability is shared with others. This is a practice of asceticism for a woman. Share warmth, time, happiness, food

2. Communicate, communicate.

3. Security “charges the battery” of a woman’s patience. Even talking about danger can reduce feminine energy.

4. Cleanliness. Cleanliness of clothes, apartment, dishes, etc. Clean where there is nothing superfluous. Otherwise, beautiful things will not be visible behind old unnecessary things. Clothes should match the entire range of a woman’s moods. But often there are those that no longer reflect, or remind of the difficult, aggravating.

5. Beauty. Beautiful things, but in such a way that they themselves do not become the cause of uncleanliness in the apartment. A man needs to surround a woman with beautiful things so that when he has a difficult period, he himself does not go crazy.

6. Trust. The ability to trust yourself and know that you are trusted too. Spiritual friendship between women, the presence of a man who will never betray a woman.

7. Cooperation (for men - competition). Collaborative activities, feeling cared for. Women are not tied to getting results; for her, “friendship wins” is more important so that they can enjoy the results of the process together. If a woman receives a “laurel wreath” for something, then she happily distributes it piece by piece to all the participants, to all those who helped.

8. The ability to share responsibility, delegate one’s responsibility (a man takes full responsibility for everything). Even if a woman alone is capable of doing something, she is more willing to share. Doesn't want to take responsibility for the end result. That is, only when they are responsible for her, a woman does not feel the fear of making a mistake, and can calmly do something.

9. Praises and compliments (previously there was a prejudice that children should not be praised, otherwise the child would become arrogant. But there are no measures in compliments for a woman, especially a girl.) On the one hand, this pleases her, on the other, her mind becomes worried, because a woman becomes attached to a man who subtly compliments her and may worry that her husband is not so generous with compliments. Therefore, women need to learn to compliment each other. You don’t have to wait for your husband to compliment a woman, but get ahead of him and do it yourself. This will eliminate unnecessary jealousy.

10. Expression of love. In any form.

11. Various types of skills, mastery. The more a woman can do, the more resilient she is. A woman must master various types of skills, for example, embroidery, knitting, making a candlestick out of nothing, playing several instruments, staging theatrical performances where there is not even any scenery, composing fairy tales for children, etc. The Vedas talk about 64 skills that a woman should master. These are beautiful, elegant and completely useless (from the point of view of men) things. For example, the ability to finish a quatrain, or juggling

12. Ability to feed. A healthy female body in itself is already a source of nutrition. The Vedas call milk “liquid religion.” The very factor of feeding, treating someone, preparing delicious food greatly increases lunar energy.

13. Unity, meetings, group joint activities.

14. Measured life, without unnecessary improvisations. Of course, there should be surprises, but a woman should know about them in advance.

Any of the following activities reveals a woman’s other abilities and desires to do something interesting. Perhaps some things may seem unrealistic to you, but this is exactly the case when dreaming is not only not harmful, but very useful.

So:

1. Massage. At least once a month. You can, of course, do it yourself, but this does not equate to what if someone did it, since in this case care is important so that the woman can relax.

2. Visiting hairdressers.

3. Manicure. The beauty of a woman's body is a factor that strengthens the family. It is not a strong woman in a strong skirt inherited from her mother who strengthens the family.

4. Bachelorette parties where you can do complete nonsense (from the point of view of men)

5. Talk to a friend on the phone for a long time. It is important for a woman to talk out her problems with loved ones, to share her emotions, otherwise it will all come down on the man.

6. Just invite each other to dinner, feed each other, and help yourself.

7. Walks. At least half an hour alone.

8. Listen to music.

9. Taking a bath. Beautiful, fragrant. At least for half an hour.

11. Go shopping, shopping. You don't even have to buy anything. It is important to abandon the paranoidly practical idea that if I have nothing to buy, then I don’t need to go there.

12. Visit to a psychological mentor. It is important for a woman to be a woman, preferably a happy one.

13. Dancing, attending dance lessons. Or yoga classes, it is better if it is led by a happy female instructor.

14. Regularly arrange walks and conversations with friends.

15. Buy yourself freshly cut flowers (without fear that they won’t understand, don’t consider it humiliation). Flowers have lunar energy, they make a woman instantly happy. Buy from the state of “I am so worthy of this that I should have flowers anyway.” Plus flowers also take away negative energy. The presence of flowers in the house charges it with lunar energy.

16. Talk to your beloved friend on the phone.

17. Spend time (or even a weekend) with your friends at the SPA center.

18. Yoga classes, a visit to the pool, a dance class - in any case, a woman is pleased when someone explains something to her, watches her, takes care of her

19. Make your own small garden, or at least grow some edible plants on the windowsill. Since everything related to nutrition and feeding is directly related to feminine energy. If you manage to get the seeds of a real Tulsi tree, then this is generally wonderful. It is believed that the level of consciousness of this tree is higher than human.

20. Communicate with other beloved, happy family women - if the woman is lonely. And if she’s married, then organize bachelorette parties.

21. Ask a man on the street to carry heavy bags. You can just make “training” bags, don’t wait for a crisis situation, train in “peacetime,” now. Just don’t think under any circumstances that, God forbid, this person might think that I’m flirting with him. Or something like what if I were 20 years old, but at my age...

22. Wander around the bookstore, look at books.

24. Invite someone into your home who can help you. At least as an experiment. One of the factors that increases a woman’s stress is “Who else, if not me.” It’s not so much the care of children and home that is burdensome, but this emotional pressure - “if I suddenly get sick, then how will everything be here without me?!” - this feeling of round-the-clock responsibility consumes a lot of energy and exhausts you. “I can’t even afford to feel bad.” Therefore, if a woman knows that they can help her, her life becomes much calmer and more joyful. This does not mean at all that she is a bad housewife, or that she cannot cope on her own - we need to get rid of this paranoia.

25. Cooking courses. Even if you cook very well, then learn from another tradition. Even if you do not achieve high results, even if you are not a fan of cooking, it is connected with the process of feeding, which increases feminine energy.

26. If there are deficiencies in the house (something creaks, doesn’t work very well). These shortcomings have a bad effect on a woman’s health; she feels them like her own sores. Sometimes it seems that a man does not pay attention to her request, but this is not so - a man does not pay attention to the little things, he waits for everything to break down so that he can immediately fix everything “in bulk.” But if a woman endured a creaky door for many months, and when in the 8th year it completely broke down and the man repaired it, then he may not hear praise addressed to her, but ridicule.

27. Make a plan. Confidence that everything happens as planned, as it should. For example, make a family entertainment plan ahead of time.

28. Give your friend a visit to a beauty salon or fashion store, pay for several classes at a dance school.

29. Arrange a dinner for some special occasion, arrange everything very beautifully, invite guests.

30. It is very good for married women to participate in events related to communication between teachers and children’s educators. The main thing is to do it on your own schedule, so that it’s a joy, maybe come up with something yourself

31. Enroll in a theater studio. The secret of drama therapy is to experience in a safe environment those emotions that are difficult in real life.

32. Have a small picnic with friends and family. It has to do with nature. Nature itself is a source of feminine energy, plus eating in nature.

33. Join the young mothers club. A small child lives his own life, so the mother does not live her own life. But heroism in this case is to take care of yourself. Discuss time management secrets with other mothers, how to find time for yourself. Maybe even organize such a community yourself.

34. Take care of other children. The advantage is that these relationships are not burdened with karmic ties. And the woman can give this child as much as she wants and can, no more, and therefore does not get tired. For mothers who are ready to experiment, you can swap children with a friend for a few hours. There is no burden around my neck that only I am responsible for this child (as is the case with mine). Arrange unloading hours for each other, “oxygen baths” - when friends take turns taking on all the children. The most important effect of this is the realization that I am not the only one responsible for this child, they can help me.

35. Feed the hungry. Either in special centers, or buy some old woman delicious food that she cannot afford.

37. Attend meetings or events that are spiritually inspiring, where people are doing something light.

38. Stay up to date with the events of your friends and relatives. But again, not out of a mood of gossip or envy. And from the mood of community, unity, empathy.

39. Watch your favorite TV program or movie, it’s good if with a friend. Not to be confused with when a person loses his personality on TV and replaces his life with someone else's.

40. Talk to your psychotherapist, mentor.

41. Learn something from another culture about cooking or interior design. Apply this in life.

42. Spend some time on the coast of the sea, lake, river, reservoir.

43. Unite with other women, organize some kind of actions, rallies like “defending women’s rights to manicures” or protecting women from carrying heavy loads. It shouldn't be heavy political - otherwise it's already solar energy. Here we are not talking about protecting your career, but about simply stating your desires and making them noticeable.

44. Arranging beautiful parades and flash mobs.

45. Ask someone to help take out old things. Carry out an inventory, for example, make 4 boxes with the inscription - “throw away”, “give away”, “put aside” (which are used seasonally), “I don’t know yet”

46. ​​Take some courses on proper nutrition and a healthy lifestyle.

48. Set up a bird feeder.

49. Visit a museum, better an art museum, and not one with all sorts of bones and remains.

50. Go to the cinema in the middle of the day.

51. Attend a meeting with some writer or poet.

52. Keep a diary of feelings and experiences. Many women consider their feelings unnecessary and priceless. And the diary allows you to realize them, so that you can later express them and convey them to your loved ones.

53. Keep a photo album for children.

54. Create an email list to which you can send photos of your family's events so that they can also keep up to date with your life.

55. Offer help to some friend of yours.

56. Enroll in modeling, sculpture, art clubs. Learn to perceive beauty from these people.

57. Make a donation to a charitable organization or somehow participate in its activities. It’s good if this organization is involved in feeding. But you can’t carry heavy things - it kills lunar energy

58. Change your hair color. Do your hair, do your mask...

59. Buy yourself a new outfit. Any new thing, something that has never been worn before, helps to increase feminine energy

60. Look at your friends’ photo albums and show them yours.

61. Daily rhythmic regular activity. A man is happier when he is given a “mission”; a man cannot stand regular responsibilities.

62. Send someone a birthday card.

63. Sign up for a floristry club. Even if you don’t learn how to compose compositions well, you will communicate with fresh flowers. And they take away negative energy

64. Invite a friend to babysit her child for at least half an hour (of course, if she doesn’t live far away, so as not to worry about traveling)

65. Married women should help unmarried women. Unmarried people should ask married people for help. Each subsequent level must be filled if the previous one is full.

Modern society, according to psychologists, is undergoing a serious transformation. Over the past decades, women's and men's roles in society have changed significantly. Due to new opportunities, women have become much more independent and wealthy, which has forced them to be more picky about choosing a life partner. Many representatives of the fair sex, due to a busy work schedule, simply physically do not have the strength to care for their family and children. As a result, they remain self-sufficient and lonely. But are they happy? How to become a happy woman if you are alone? Today we decided to discuss this pressing and serious issue.

Feminine energy: what is a woman meant for?

A woman is an amazing creature who, despite all her external fragility and tenderness, has incredible strong energy. This energy allows the fair sex to bear the burden of responsibility for the family, support their husband, raise children and build a career. It is believed that for all this you need to have amazing strength. So where does it come from in a woman?

The fact is that a woman’s purpose is to search for happiness and love. She was created to envelop her loved ones with love and take care of them. Only then can a woman be happy and her life be filled with meaning. Have you ever noticed that men are drawn to certain representatives of the fair sex, although they may not be distinguished by their beauty and wealth? But they run away from others like fire, despite the fact that they are well-groomed and self-sufficient. What is the secret of female attractiveness? It lies precisely in energy; men always feel amazingly when they meet the very girl filled with feminine attractiveness. And then they no longer pay attention to appearance and other little things, wanting to give all their time to their chosen one, from whom they receive warmth in return.

Based on all this, it is not surprising that most women associate happiness with having a man in their lives. And with all their inherent strength and enthusiasm they rush in search of the only one who can give them an incredible life. After all, in their opinion, it is simply impossible for a single woman to become happy. Or does such a possibility still exist?

Single or free: a look at the problem

Russian society in many of its features preserves the patriarchal traditions of its ancestors. This greatly distinguishes our compatriots from Western women. Naturally, these differences affect attitudes towards marriage and life in general. Western young ladies do not wonder how to become a happy woman if you are alone. For them this is a completely normal existence. After all, the feminist movement originated in the West, where women actively fought for their rights and freedoms. Their mentality contains the concept that a woman living without a husband is free and a priori happy. After all, she is not bound by marriage, responsibilities and restrictions. She can independently choose her job, friends, place of residence and hobbies. No one can dictate terms to a free woman and make her financially dependent on a man. Beautiful picture, isn't it? It is their freedom and independence that Western ladies cherish more than anything else.

In Russian society, according to tradition, a woman must be married. Otherwise, she is considered a loser, who over time becomes the subject of ridicule and gossip from her more “lucky” friends. After all, it is not customary for us to call unmarried people free - they are single. Can a single woman become a happy woman? Without men, life is boring and gray... So our women rush into the pool of passions, looking for that same Prince in everyone they meet. But often such adventures end in disappointment and return the woman to a state of loneliness. But you always want happiness and at any age. So how to become a happy woman if you are alone?

Reasons for female loneliness

Of course, there are many reasons for female loneliness. But still, psychologists identify several basic prerequisites for becoming lonely. It is with this problem that more than seventy percent of the fair sex come to the psychotherapist’s office. We have identified three reasons:

1. Feminism

In recent years, feminist ideas have penetrated the minds of modern women, and they have begun to consciously refuse relationships with men. Such representatives of the fair sex spend all their energy on their careers and become quite successful and independent. Their life looks rich and varied. Such ladies quite openly state their views and often even start conducting trainings on “How to become a successful and happy woman.”

2. Self-interest

The suddenly opened opportunities showed women that life could be incredibly beautiful and carefree. Therefore, many began to pay great attention to the financial component of the relationship. They consider candidates based on wealth and position in society. As a result, they often cannot find a worthy man. Or every new romance with a candidate for a hand and heart ends without moving into the stage of a serious relationship. After all, a man, noticing such an attitude towards himself, also does not seek to see other qualities in a woman other than external attractiveness. And he obviously won’t make her the cherished proposal.

3. Excessive demands on men

Most modern women have begun to place inflated demands on their men. They began to consider themselves worthy of a better life than cleaning the house, cooking and taking care of their husband. This trend has also affected married ladies, who began to en masse file for divorce from those who, in their opinion, are no longer worthy of their attention.

Be that as it may, many women, having become lonely for the reasons listed above, are increasingly turning to psychoanalysts for advice. Which means they don't feel happy at all. What is the reason? And how can you feel the fullness of life again and become happy?

Types of female loneliness

Psychologists say that all women wondering how a single woman can become happy (without a man) can be divided into two categories:

• disappointed;
• free.

Ladies from the first category become lonely due to resentment and disappointment in men. They desperately want to get married, but are very afraid of being hurt again and are in a constant state of conflict with themselves. As a result, a woman turns into a constantly complaining and angry person who repels men with her energy alone.

The second category of single women chose their own path. No, once they could have been a couple, but in this life situation they are alone, and this is their conscious choice. Such representatives of the fairer sex are not deprived of male attention, but they do not build serious relationships. This is due to several very common psychological attitudes:

• make a career and then start a family;
• gain financial independence;
• the desire to command the male sex and decide everything independently.

Both types of female loneliness sooner or later end in depression, because any of the women feels her true destiny and strives to create a family with a worthy representative of the strong half of humanity.

In search of happiness: how not to be lonely?

If you are single and strive to start a family, seeing this as your happiness, but you just can’t meet that same man, then you should approach this search from the point of view of science and psychology. First of all, a woman should look at herself from the outside, because men are extremely sensitive and are always subconsciously repelled by certain female types. Perhaps you are one of those people. Keep in mind that men especially avoid the following two types:

1. Woman-man

No, we're not talking about looks. A woman with a masculine character can be surprisingly attractive and beautiful, but an overly tough character will prevent her from building a happy relationship. Such ladies always know what they want, listen little to other people’s opinions, do an excellent job with all men’s housework and have good earnings. Men usually do not experience physical attraction to such ladies and try not to start relationships with them.

2. Snow Queen

These women are simply flawless in appearance. They always have time to take care of themselves; even in a busy work schedule, they will find a couple of hours to go to a beauty salon. The Snow Queen is completely focused on herself and her feelings, she is concerned that under no circumstances should she lose her sense of perfection. Therefore, men with such beauties often feel uncomfortable and strive to break up with them as soon as possible.

If you recognize yourself in these descriptions, then start serious work on yourself, and the man of your dreams will definitely appear in your life.

In some cases, a woman remains single after a painful divorce. She may be left with children in her arms, and behind her back - a baggage of disappointments and dissatisfaction with life. If you do not pay attention to this, then happiness will never shine in the eyes of a divorced woman. Therefore, you should learn to make yourself happy on your own.

As psychoanalysts testify, after a divorce it is much more difficult for a woman to feel happy, unlike a man. Even after initiating the divorce, she experiences deep depression and a feeling of uselessness in the first months of her free life. In many cases, this feeling becomes a woman’s constant companion.

To become happy after a divorce, you must first realize that happiness has nothing to do with having a man in your life. After all, he was married, and this did not bring you the long-awaited happiness. This means that it’s not at all a matter of the stamp in the passport and the men’s shoes in the hallway. Happiness is a feeling that we need every day. Get yourself a notebook where you will write down all your dreams and desires. Just be sure to do everything - small and big, serious and ridiculous. You need to write down your dreams every day and complete one point every day. Don’t make excuses for lack of opportunities and strength, start your life anew and fill it with everything you would like. After a month of such work on your life, you will feel that happiness has become your constant companion, and your eyes burn with an incredibly bright fire. And who knows, maybe this fire will attract new love into your life.

Loneliness: how not to turn into a strong woman?

So, you are alone now. It doesn’t matter what reasons led to this, but you are already inside the situation. How to live in harmony with yourself and not turn into that very strong woman who pushes away the male sex during your time of loneliness? How to stay attractive and happy? It's actually not difficult at all:

• always turn to men for help - you should not carry the heaviest bags, move furniture and repair cars, this will only reduce your feminine energy;
• have men's housework done by special people or male friends;
• dress in dresses - they contribute to the accumulation of feminine energy and increased attractiveness in the eyes of men;
• take care of yourself - go to cosmetologists and stylists, to a cafe with girlfriends or indulge in shopping;
• communicate with other people - set aside time more often to visit, go to the cinema or theater;
• learn to enjoy everyday things - in this case, happiness will always accompany you.

Surprisingly, psychologists have proven that a happy woman attracts the opposite sex like a magnet. And even if you are not planning to start a new romance, male attention always lifts your spirits. But this is a component of happiness, isn’t it?

Happiness comes in different forms: how to understand yourself?

You are successful, beautiful and feel great. But when you come to visit, you always feel the sidelong glances of your acquaintances and are embarrassed by questions about your unmarried status. This is a familiar situation, right? Many women, having achieved what they wanted in life, suddenly lose their sense of happiness and completely devalue themselves, rushing to find a man. Stop. Stop and think - no one's opinion should be more important than your feelings and emotions. Therefore, if you like to live alone, and you enjoy this life, then perhaps you simply do not need a man. No, not completely unnecessary, but at this time you can do just fine without it and go about your business. This is what brings you happiness.

By the way, there are quite a lot of women who are preoccupied with finding a husband under pressure from others. Psychologists even put them in a special category, although to be happy they simply need to ignore other people’s opinions.

How to change your life and become a happy woman?

You should not be afraid of loneliness; it is an absolutely normal state for any person. After all, it cannot be assessed only from the negative side; it has a lot of pluses and positives. Therefore, learn to treat loneliness a little differently than is customary in society, and you will be able to see all the benefits of this state:

• enjoy freedom and the right to choose - after all, only you decide where to spend the evening and what curtains to buy for the living room;
• show healthy selfishness - a single woman does not need to spend all her time on her family, she can allow herself to be pampered;
• do not compare your life with the lives of other people - everyone has their good and bad times;
• Constantly expand your circle of acquaintances - communicating with a large number of new people sharpens your eloquence and trains your mind.

And keep in mind that loneliness can be used to great benefit for yourself: spend your free time on self-development. This will be the wisest decision in life.

It's easy to give advice to single women. Relatives, parents and friends are happy to tell you how to become happy. They all vying with each other to praise their lives and impose certain stereotypes. All this can make even the most confident lady’s head spin. But how to become a happy woman if you are alone?

Just enjoy life!! Every new day, minute and hour, cultivate a feeling of happiness in yourself. After all, it does not at all depend on relationships, wealth and social status. Aren't married women unhappy and lonely? What about wealthy beauties? Do you really think that they always experience incredible happiness from their situation? We think this is the clearest proof that happiness depends only on a person’s inner state.

Look inside yourself and honestly ask what exactly will make you happy. Now take action. Right now, without delaying until later. After all, this is your path to happiness.

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“Morality teaches not how to become happy, but how to become worthy of happiness.”

―Immanuel Kant

I wonder if every woman can say that she is happy? When we are asked a similar question, we immediately answer - of course, I am happy, because I have everything - a caring husband, children, a job I love.

Is this about you? Then you are on the right track. But the most important thing is not to convince yourself of this, but to really feel this way.

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Positive thinking is the first step to victory. But some women tend to succumb to other people's opinions, thinking that happiness should be the way it is written in books or shown on TV. Such women become depressed... And then, having suffered enough, they subject their loved ones to oppression.

How to learn to be happy every day

Day after day, the minutes of our lives expire, a woman strives to be in time everywhere, to be and remain, healthy, beautiful, to succeed as a mother, to be loved and, of course, to make a career. In the bustle of these days, we sometimes forget to even just look up and see how beautiful the blue sky is and how beautifully the birds sing.

You need to stop and look around and find the beauty in the little things, because there is no “yesterday” and “tomorrow”, but only "Here and now". Think about the fact that tomorrow may never come. What would you do today? Maybe you should live to the fullest, breathe deeply, do what you have long dreamed of and say “I love” to everyone you love.

But don’t forget that the advice to live every day like it’s your last does not mean that you should drink, party and do stupid things. Try to enjoy every moment! This is not easy to learn, but if you start now, you will soon learn to be happy regardless of circumstances and people.

14 golden rules of happiness:

1. When you wake up, the first thing you do is smile at yourself and the sun (smile at your family, friends, passers-by)…
2. Stop complaining about life, comparing yourself to others, and thinking negatively. Learn to enjoy the little things without taking failures to heart.
3. Find your hobby.
4. Unlearn negative thinking and “cut off” all thoughts about bad things.
5. Enjoy food (while eating, think about food, its smell, taste, stop watching TV).
6. Take a walk outside, enjoying nature.
7. Watch life-affirming films, listen to pleasant music (audio, song or video does not matter), choose something that pleases and warms the soul, let it be a melodrama or a thriller, a comedy series or a historical film...
8. Forgive the offenders and let go of the past, leave only good things in the present. It's easy to learn to forgive you need to forgive yourself first, because we are human, we tend to make mistakes. Remember how in the movie “Eat, Pray, Love”? Send a ray of light to someone dear to you, so you will give a piece of yourself, starting a new life filled with happiness.
9. Read books or essays on psychology (fortunately there are plenty of them). For example, Dale Carnegie and his “Textbook of Life”, Louise Hay “Everything a Woman Wants”, Sister Stephanie “What to Name a Child to Make Him Happy”..., Mrinal Kumar Gupta “How to Always Be Happy”, in each of the books has its own morality.
   find various trainings and affirmations (they are available online and completely free on the Internet).
10. Do good to others for free.
11. Take time for yourself (thinking about the meaning of life, plans for the summer, etc.).
12. Always put “love” first in all situations.
13. Dream.
14. Give thanks for everything you have now.

Joy in the family

Every woman should remember that there is nothing more expensive than family. It is this that is the foundation of happiness. And your heart will tell you how to be happy in your family.

There are two options:

1. You understand that you don’t love your husband, having clearly realized that he is not your person and you are unhappy with him - leave.
2. You accept your spouse as he is, without wanting to change “to suit you.”

The recipe is simply simple.

Next, you should understand that it is very important to become a lover, a loving wife and a good mother in one person in the family. Dr. Torsunov, in his lectures on Ayurveda - the science of life, reveals principles that help family people improve relationships, diet, and get rid of bad habits. For example, giving lectures can help you quit smoking or get rid of cravings for alcohol if your husband or wife drinks.

In a relationship with a man

The main rules for strong and long-lasting relationships:

• become his friend
• take care of yourself
• learn to cook deliciously
• "don't blow your mind"
• surprise him in bed
• leave him time for personal space (going to a sports bar, drinking beer with friends)
• say "I love you"
• don't try to change it
• be yourself

Such simple, but at the same time complex rules will help you not to lose your man.

If you are getting married, think about whether communication with your lover brings you joy. Maybe you're just jealous of other married couples, or you're just tired of parental care? Then there is no need to rush into marriage.

Psychologists advise downloading the book “How to Become Loved and Desired.” It was written by modern writer Oksana Duplyakina. The author gives advice to all women. With her books, she teaches women to be more confident in themselves, to recognize their chosen one or husband from the other side, to establish relationships with him…. And here’s what Carnegie’s “Textbook of Life” tells us about the relationship between a husband and his wife:
do not criticize or find fault with your husband;
there is no reason for jealousy, do not pursue him for any reason;
show each other signs of attention, know how to listen to your interlocutor;
be proactive, that is, notify your husband in advance about your or common plans;
read a good book about sex (spouses can get to know each other better).

But what about a man - should he do something? Of course I should.

Read A. Pushkin’s poem “Onegin’s Letter to Tatyana”, the heroes of this work are happy or maybe depressed by their feelings... think about who you are for your man, who are you next to him?

Typically, the reasons for divorce or quarrels in relationships are lack of money, dissatisfaction in sexual relationships, or divergence of interests.

Being married is a real art that requires learning and new practices. Rimma Home’s book “Magical Women’s Things” is especially for women. She will tell you that you are a valuable prize, a godsend for a man, they will hunt you like prey. Decide on a “magic experiment” with Rimma. The writer has a wealth of experience in communicating with the opposite sex, passes it on to other women, and advises how to keep a loved one, without straining too much, how to raise your self-esteem. You can learn more about this book by reading reviews and reviews from readers.

Alone

What to do if a woman is alone?

Accept this reality as a new stage in life and enjoy your solitude. You don’t have to cook for someone in the morning or wash dirty socks, you live for yourself and can do whatever you want. Enjoy this period and you won’t notice how the one person with whom you want to wash your socks and cook breakfast will appear in your life.

Understand that successful and happy people attract others like them. If you are heartbroken and suffer, you will attract the same loser to you.

(For all those who want to change everything in their lives once and for all, we recommend Vitaly Gibert’s book “Modeling the Future”).

After reading the text on Tibetan medicine by a Tibetan doctor, you will understand that women do not have time to develop in the modern world, that is, their physical condition - the physical does not keep up with the spiritual. Previously, it was not like this, women gave birth to 5-10 children, but did not do additional things, and were much less tired. So, you are in a period when a woman is cleansing her body (menstruation), you also need to cleanse yourself spiritually, do meditation, for example, or do something useful, simple, you can’t be nervous these days, splashing out your energy too much, you need Let only good feelings into your soul. According to this theory, women are divided into 3 types: wind (lung), bile (trip), mucus (badkan). Not very pleasant names, but it’s worth studying these types of female energy, at least for general development. Moreover, each type has its own character, its own diet, which helps to cope with PMS and, as a result, increase your vitality. It seems like simple recommendations that will help a woman overcome difficulties and establish contact with herself and other people.

Say in front of the mirror - I am strong, I am a person worthy of respect and love, I value myself and love myself for who I am! Despite the loneliness, as you can see, I am alive, and everything will be fine with me.

Even if it so happens that you live without your husband, or he betrayed you, know how to leave in English, because life is in full swing, thank God that you have loved ones, friends, possibly children, parents. Try to visit them every day, giving them love to everyone, you will also become happier! If you are really sad, you can get a pet; it will definitely become a source of positive emotions for you.

Love and be loved!

Yesterday I received a link to this lecture in LiveJournal. I love listening to Narushevich, for his pleasant voice, for his subtlety, but here I was puzzled... At first I thought that he would talk about feminism and so on, but, having started listening, I just constantly smile, I agree with many things...

It all comes down to the fact that a woman must generate feminine energy. We need to nourish ourselves. It doesn't matter whether you're in a relationship or not. Whether you feel bad or good. You need “food”, you need energy fullness. Without which a woman, no matter how beautiful and well-groomed, can hardly be called a woman. After all, what distinguishes a woman. Answer: femininity...Yin.

In general, I started listening to a very interesting series of lectures aimed at the concept of the essence of femininity. About wrong behavior, about mistakes, about How and What to do in life in order to be harmonious and happy. If I have time, I will take notes on the lectures I listened to and make notes for myself. If I happen to be a woman, then I need to carry my essence with dignity, having first understood and accepted it in my heart...

Ruslan Narushevich. "How and why to become happy without the help of men."

Ruslan Narushevich is a professional astrologer from Riga.
Born in January 1967 in Ventspils, Latvia. While studying at school, he developed an interest in popular astrology. Since 1991, he studied at the Latvian State University, majoring in English language and literature, and taught at school. At the same time, acquaintance with Vedic culture occurs.
Knowledge of the English language and the desire to help people leads to the beginning of a serious study of Vedic psychology and astrology.
Since 1996, he has been giving popular science lectures on the Vedic scriptures and conducting personal consultations on Vedic psychology and astrology.
Married and has two beautiful children.
Lesson 1 - And you definitely need to do this! 9.10.2008
Lesson 2 - And this must be done! 10/23/2008
Lesson 3 - And be sure to do this! 06.11.2008
Lesson 4 - And be sure to do this! 11/20/2008
Lesson 5 - Ask questions, learn more. 04.12.2008

Recordings of the live radio broadcast of "Ayurveda Radio". This series of radio programs is especially recommended for women, girls, girls.

1. Go for a massage.

2. Wear skirts.

3. Get a manicure.

5. Take up dancing.

6. Sign up for the pool.

7. Take a cooking class.

8. Buy yourself a bouquet of flowers. (flowers instantly make a woman happy - they take away negative energy)

9. Disassemble the wardrobe (divide all things into 4 categories: leave, throw away, give away, I don’t know yet)

10. Make a plan for the next day, week or month.

11. Go to a yoga class (preferably the instructor is a married woman)

12. Ask a stranger to carry your bag.

13. Buy yourself a new outfit.

14. Sign up for singing lessons.

15. Visit a hairdresser.

16. Chat with a friend for a long time (on the phone or meet her).

17. Make time for a walk - by yourself or with friends.

18. Listen to your favorite music.

19. Lie in the bath with aromatic oils, rose petals, salt.

20. Go shopping - you don’t have to buy anything (be sure to take a friend with you so she can take pictures of you in the outfits you try on)

21. Get together with friends and do all sorts of nonsense.

22. Go to a psychologist (preferably the psychologist is a woman)

23. Invite friends and have a dinner party.

24. Participate in the life of your child’s kindergarten or school.

25. Participate in charity.

26. Offer help to a friend.

28. Regularly set aside time for walks with friends.

29. Set up a feeding trough.

30. Visit the SPA center.

31. Start growing flowers (preferably fruit-bearing or edible plants).

32. Go to an art museum.

33. Keep a diary of thoughts and feelings.

34. Make a photo album of your photos or photos of your child.

35. Babysit a friend's child.

36. Watch a movie in a cinema.

37. Unselfishly participate in the work of medical institutions. Help other people.

38. Compliment other women.

39. Learn new skills (jangle, embroider, knit, do various crafts)

40. Send a postcard (with or without a reason)

41. Sign up for a floristry class.

42. I was invited to (hire) a person who would fix all the minor breakdowns in the apartment

43. Go to a bookstore and just look through the books and see what's new.

44. Chat with happy married women.

45. Arrange a weekend trip out of town with your friends, without particularly reporting where you will go.

46. Participate in holidays, parades, costume processions.

47. Invite someone to help you with cleaning, shopping, cooking.

48. Enroll in a theater studio.

49. Have a picnic.

50. Form a club for young mothers or join existing clubs

51. Feed hungry people.

53. Look at fashion magazines, with models of knitted items, with interiors.

54. Staying up to date with friends' events (feeling of participation)

55. Participate in spiritual and religious events.

56. Watch a movie or TV series with your friend (or children).

57. Be interested in Vedic or any other culture (cuisine, interior, traditions).

58. Spend some time on the coast.

59. Learn to ski.

60. Take part in rallies in defense of women's rights (for manicures, for more toilets)

61. Go to a nunnery, find a woman there, so that you can trust her, find spiritual communication.

62. Sign up for courses on proper nutrition, healthy eating.

63. Use environmentally friendly household chemicals.

64. Listen to a speech by the author of a book you liked.

65. Send photos of your family to friends and girlfriends.

66. Sign up for a painting and sculpting club.

67. Change your hair color.

68. Invite your friends and show them your photo album.

69. Go with your friends to chat and sit in a cafe.