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What should the essay “My Room” be like? How does living in a very small apartment affect a person? From one to two years

Many people arrange a nursery for their baby from birth, but psychologists are against this approach. For a child under one year old, the closest possible contact with his mother is important, and when he reaches this age, an angle of parents' bedroom where he can play. The minimum age for transfer to a separate room is three years: some children already during this period strive to be separated from adults. In most cases, the period when a child needs personal space occurs at the age of five to seven. It is especially important to have your own space in adolescence, from the age of 12, an isolated room for a child is a vital necessity.

Of course, each family is individual: some children from birth get used to sleeping in a separate room and feel great, others have difficulty getting used to independence even at early school age. You should not force your baby to move away from his parents; it is advisable to make him want to sleep and play in his own room. To do this, you can involve him in arranging the room, consult with him when choosing furniture or wallpaper, emphasizing how mature and independent he has become.

If it is not possible to allocate a room

If the family lives in one-room apartment, then the child needs to organize separate corner using a screen or partition. The baby should have his own sleeping area and a learning area where he can play or do his homework. The main thing is that the space organized for the child is spacious and bright enough. It is also advisable to allocate space for his things and toys. If it is not possible to purchase or install a separate cabinet, then you should give it a shelf in your parents’ closet.

What to do if there are several children?

If there are two or three children in a family, parents do not always have the opportunity to arrange their own room for each one. According to psychologists, this is not always necessary - until you reach a senior age. school age children can live together, especially for children of the same sex. Two sisters or two brothers sometimes get so used to living in the same room that separate rooms they are not needed until they leave parents' house. But here it is important to take into account the age of the children - if the difference is too big, then the daily routine will be different. This means that they will interfere with each other’s rest. For example, the younger one will go to bed while the older one is still far from sleep. Very Small child may often wake up at night and cry, disturbing the sleep of other children.

If several children live together, each should have their own place to play and study. At the same time, it is not recommended to rigidly divide the room into parts - this contributes to increased rivalry between children - a soft division into several parts using layout or decoration is preferable. Each child should have his own chair and table, closet, sleeping place, and play area can be made common. This separation promotes socialization and teaches children to play together and interact with each other. If it is possible to allocate each person their own room, from the age of six you need to ask the children whether they want to live together or are they ready to move to a separate nursery?

Having children in the same room has its advantages - they become more independent, learn to maintain order in their part of the room, share toys with a brother or sister, and find compromises. Big problem For parents, it may be that their youngest child moves into a room that was previously occupied only by the eldest. Moreover, the older the first child is and the longer he lives alone, the more difficult it is to allocate a place for his brother or sister without conflicts. Try not to scold or force the elder, try to come to an agreement with him, take his opinion into account when remodeling the premises.

Many children are afraid to sleep alone. How to teach a child to be independent? The child psychologist of the portal “I am a parent” tells about what parents should do in this case.

Personal space for children of different sexes

While children are small, the presence of children of different sexes in the same room does not cause any special problems. Psychologists claim that children of different sexes in the same room are more friendly. Each child should have his own place in this room - his personal space where he could “be alone.” As children grow up, when the eldest child turns 12 years old, the children's room will have to be divided into two halves using a screen, closet, thick curtain or partition. Find out what your children think and plan the room according to their wishes. You can arrange one common area for both children and separate areas for each child with sliding partitions. To maintain peace and tranquility in the family, it is important to always consult with both children so that neither of them feels disadvantaged, then friendly relations between the children will be preserved.

To avoid quarrels between children, try to follow the following rules:

  1. When organizing a nursery, take into account the child’s opinion and taste. Don't forget that this is his room, not yours. At the same time, if several children live in a room, you should listen equally to each child.
  2. Even if several children live in a room, everyone should have personal place, where only he alone has access. This can be either a whole corner, if space allows, or at least a separate box where the baby can store his things.
  3. Teach your children to negotiate on their own and interfere in their conflicts as little as possible.
  4. Determine immediately which things belong to the elder, which belong to the younger, and which will be shared.
  5. Set up a personal area for each child different colors, and make monograms with the owner’s name on toy boxes and other things. This way all children will feel like masters in their own corner.
  6. Take care of competent planning children's room, there should be no unnecessary things in it. Then the children will have more space to relax and joint games, and therefore for .

Parents should think in advance about how to arrange workplace schoolchild at home. Where will the table be? How to choose a chair? What kind of lighting will be required? You will find answers to these and other questions in a video lesson with the participation of an expert from the “I am a Parent” portal.

Ekaterina Kushnir

Wallpaper with bunnies, curtains with squirrels, a children's bed - and a child settled in his parents' room. Is this a familiar picture? Why does this happen and when is it actually time to move the baby away?

In some families, the process of moving out is constantly postponed, while in others it proceeds with tantrums from the child and stress for everyone.

There are two most popular points of view:

  • The sooner, the easier. Many people put their children in a separate crib, and then in a separate room, almost from birth, believing that, rather than earlier child If he learns to sleep separately, he will become more independent.
  • The closer, the calmer. In other families, on the contrary, they try to keep the baby near them for as long as possible, believing that in this way he will feel protected, and therefore grow up more calm and self-confident.

In fact, both points of view have pros and cons, and what to choose is up to parents to decide. But you still have to take into account all the age nuances.

Up to a year

Transferring a baby is a decisive act. After all, it is at this age that a child needs his mother’s warmth, milk and constant care. In addition, there are a number of disadvantages of such relocation:

  • Difficult for parents to control temperature regime in the room;
  • Parents are not around to cover or, conversely, uncover the child;
  • The child asks for attention quite often, and the mother will simply not get enough sleep, constantly running to him.

However, mothers and fathers who have tried this option on themselves are often satisfied, because there are also advantages:

  • The child immediately gets used to a separate room, and then nothing needs to be changed;
  • The baby’s room is always quiet, no one disturbs a restful sleep. Parents can watch TV, talk, and go to bed whenever they want.

If you decide to move your baby to a separate room, think about safety - a baby who cannot crawl yet may accidentally bury his nose in the blanket. Remove all soft objects from the crib and do not use a pillow. Place the crib away from outlets, batteries, and electrical objects. And also think about a radio or video baby monitor so that the baby is always “in touch”.

From one to two years

Most practiced in families age period for relocation - from one to two years. After all, it is at this age:

  • Breastfeeding often stops;
  • The regime has already been formed;
  • The child eats less at night.

As a rule, children one and a half to two years old can still move to a new place quite easily, especially if parents do it gradually:

  • First, they are taught to sleep in a separate crib;
  • Then they put the crib in a separate room for a daytime nap;
  • For some time, perhaps, mom or dad sleeps at night with the baby next to them (the child in the crib, the parent on a folding bed or sofa).

However, if the baby begins to be capricious, then it is difficult to come to an agreement with him: he still does not respond to persuasion and explanations. Therefore, if, when moving the baby to another room, hysterics become more frequent, the child becomes nervous, tics appear, he starts peeing in his pants again, biting his nails or doing something else, the moving process should be postponed until a later time.

Two or three years and later

With a child that's getting closer to three years old, it’s easier to agree: tell a fairy tale about a bunny who needed his own hut, explain that there is no longer enough space for dolls and cars in mom’s room. Physically, a three-year-old baby is already completely ready to move: almost everyone at this age sleeps all night, without snacks, pacifiers or bottles. However, such kids already understand perfectly well what’s what, and therefore they often play tricks: they come to their mother’s bed in the middle of the night. And if parents don't object, this can develop into a habit. Here important nuances moving a three-year-old child:

  • Translate also smoothly and gradually, like younger children;
  • If a child comes to mom and dad's room at night, do not allow him to sleep on the parent's bed - it is better to hold him on your lap, stroke him, calm him down, and then go together to his room and calmly put the baby to bed there.

So, each age has its own characteristics. Psychologists believe that it is necessary to transfer a child to a separate room when he develops a desire for independence. But every child is individual, and the desire to do everything on their own manifests itself in children in different ways: for some at two years old, for others at three, for others at four. So there is no universal advice for transferring to a separate room: the main thing is that not only the baby is ready for this, but also the parents themselves.

From a lecture by R. Narushevich

When a woman lives alone, she allows herself to have her own room. As soon as she gets married, “goodbye” to her own room. Even those who large apartments. "We entered new apartment, holiday, what joy! “My son,” he says, “has a room, my husband has a room!” I say: “What about you?” - "Bedroom". I say: “This is not your room. The bedroom is the room with the husband. Where is your room? Silence. “Well, the kitchen,” he says. - “Yes, congratulations. It was worth taking out a 30-year lease to spend all those 30 years in the kitchen.”

The idea is that you need to take care of the relationship.
“So, I need my own room, from which I don’t have to leave until I look the way I want my husband to see me. All. There's no bedroom there. If I want him to see me as soon as I wake up, then he will see me like this. If I just want her to be beautiful, combed, maybe with makeup, it doesn’t matter, then she will see me like that.”

A woman should have her own room. Always. This is the place where she has to break dishes or tear up her husband's notes because she is upset with him. Where she must put herself in order, where she can be in bad mood, or when she looks very bad, when her body goes through certain stages, some kind of crisis. Where she can read or be alone if she needs to. Where she can let her husband come if she wants.

It's not that difficult. This is an internal complex that a woman cannot afford one room. People buy big houses, and they still don't have a woman's room. No woman's room.

Source: http://audioveda.livejournal.com/51696.html
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I listened to a lecture by R. Narushevich. I agree with him. The point is not that a woman should always be beautiful and smiling, and her husband should not show emotions. But! Don’t you ever want to retire, to be alone with yourself in YOUR personal space? And go out to the man in beautiful view, and not always in a robe in the morning. Don’t you really want to have your own piece of the house, in which everything will be the way you want? And lie - or even lie - as you like? A place where you can calmly do your intimate affairs without hearing the knock on the bathroom, because your relatives also need to go there?

I know that in Russia, more precisely in major cities, housing is really very difficult, and very few people can afford a separate room. I listened to the author's entire lecture. He advises that if it is not possible to have a whole room, then you need to organize for yourself at least some kind of nook, an alcove with a curtain, at least something that will be a woman’s personal space, where everything will be as it pleases her.
How are you doing with this?