Is it possible to celebrate the first anniversary of death earlier? Every religion has its own traditions of remembrance. How Christians remember the dead

Each of us, sooner or later, is faced with the death of people close to him, whose departure to another world can be different: due to a long illness, car accident, murder, accident and even suicide. Death is inevitable for all of us. However, there is no need to become depressed when you learn of the death of a loved one. The only thing we can do is help him correctly transition to another world. Most of what we know or hear from someone about the remembrance of the dead is a lie or a distorted truth. In order to understand this difficult issue, let us turn to the teachings of the Orthodox faith.

Many people ask the following questions: “How to remember the dead?”, “How to remember the deceased?”, “How do they remember?” All questions have the same meaning. And the answer is in this article.

Many people associate the phrase “commemoration of the dead” with the distribution of sweets, the pouring of alcoholic drinks at the funeral table, and with visiting a church in which it is necessary to light a candle for the deceased. This is a fallacy with shades of truth.

Before we talk about the correctness of commemorating the deceased, let’s start with how to properly bury the deceased. Usually people who do not go to church and do not know the norms of funerals arrange funerals according to pagan canons, without even knowing it themselves. “They still bury it this way, so it’s the way it’s supposed to be,” many argue.

The first common misconception are wreaths. The fact is that during the reign of the kings, no one knew about wreaths; people brought only fresh flowers to funerals. Wreaths appeared after the arrival of the godless Soviet regime. When one young man named Andrei, during clinical death visited the next world (see the film “Visiting Eternity”), he was especially shocked by what he saw in hell: many people were hanging on wreaths. The wreaths in this case were like a noose around the neck. The angels explained to him: “When relatives, even with great love choose wreaths and place them on the grave, they themselves do not even suspect that by these actions they are dooming their deceased loved one to unbearable suffering. The more wreaths, the more loops around the neck of the soul of the deceased in the next world.”

Second misconception - This is a funeral table with alcohol. Know: the more alcohol (especially vodka) is drunk, the more detrimental it is to the soul of the deceased. In Orthodoxy there is an expression: “Whoever remembers with alcohol wishes eternal torment for the deceased.” The best thing for the deceased is to donate food for homeless and low-income people, invite people close to you to your home and treat them, but without alcohol.

Third misconception - these are sweets. For some reason, many people think that after the death of the deceased it is necessary to distribute sweets and cookies to neighbors. Sweets will not make the deceased worse, unlike alcohol, but it will also be better. “Why not sweets, because everyone does it?” - you ask. The fact is that sweets, like alcohol, are products of gluttony. And if you give sweets for a deceased relative, then you are pushing people into this sin of gluttony.

The best thing is to sit down with your relatives at the table, treat them to hearty food, and remember all those good qualities character possessed by the deceased. And also distribute food to neighbors and passersby. Ideal option will be if you give it to exactly the person who needs food due to financial problems. It will be like your alms for the deceased.

The fourth misconception - funeral music. Surely you have heard funeral music that immediately gave you goosebumps and made you want to close your ears so as not to hear it. However, some resort to the services of funeral bands. Perspicacious saints who could see what they could not to an ordinary person, claimed that demons flock to the funeral music and begin to dance joyfully. This explains that by ordering an orchestra for a funeral, we do not say goodbye to grief with a loved one, but only please the demons by arranging a disco for them.

“So how to properly lead a person to the next world?”, - you ask. Everything is much simpler than it seems. In commemorating the dead, one must rely on the Bible and the teachings of the saints. IN Orthodox churches books are sold with detailed description about how to bury and remember your loved ones. This article is based on Orthodox rules about commemoration (especially for those who do not have the opportunity to buy such literature).

When a person dies, for the first three days his soul is on Earth and walks where it wants. Most often, the soul of the deceased is next to his body. During this period, relatives need to be especially attentive to their feelings and thoughts, because it is through thoughts that the soul of the deceased can communicate with us. It happens that suddenly we begin to experience some emotions, it is we who begin to feel what the deceased is feeling now. The same goes for thoughts. Be extremely attentive to every thought that comes to you.

Then the soul of the deceased must go to God to bow, but in heaven it is met by demons who do not let the soul through and arrange for it ordeals for all sins. Many are stuck there due to childhood sins that they no longer remember. The fact is that until the age of seven, a person’s soul is sinless; these are infants. Starting from the age of 7, demons keep an account of each sin and write them down in their charters. During baptism, a person is given a guardian angel who protects him and records all his good deeds. After death, the soul of the deceased is judged according to these lists. In order to go through the ordeal, a person during earthly life must confess and receive communion, because at confession all sins are burned away. But! For everything to burn forgotten sins, in particular the sins of childhood, must be unctioned. Unction must be held once a year, you can go to confession at least every day. But to take communion no more than 8 times a year, since due to their sins people are not worthy to take communion more than 8 times a year. The exceptions are children under 7 years of age and pregnant women.

If you want the soul of a deceased person close to you to go through the ordeal without obstacles, then you need to read the Psalms for up to 40 days: every day 2-5 Psalms, and there you read everything. After those Psalms where it is written: “Glory,” it is necessary to say: “Glory to the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, Amen. Lord, rest the soul of the servant of God (name), forgive him/her all voluntary and involuntary sins and grant him/her the Kingdom of Heaven.” As you read the Psalms, the sins of the deceased fall away like leaves from trees.

After 40 days, the fate of the soul is decided: a place is determined for it - in heaven or hell. You can read more about hell.

If we love our loved ones, then during their lifetime we try to give them gifts, help them with something, hug them, kiss them, thereby showing our love. If a person we love dies, then we can show our love for him in one and only way - this is a memorial service. They take place every time after morning services. For the funeral service, you need to buy food in advance. Required: bread or something baked (but not sweet!) and fruit. The rest is up to your capabilities. Usually they bring flour, cereals, vegetable oil. Absolutely forbidden: alcohol and sweets. Also for the memorial service you need a note with the names of all those deceased for whom you want to pray. The note is not written in any form; there is a special form that is available in any church. Place the food on the table for funeral services, next to a note, or wherever you are told to do so. Food is your alms for your deceased. It is advisable for you to be present at the funeral service; it only lasts about 15 minutes. The fact is that during the funeral service, the souls of the dead come to the temple and stand next to us, at this moment the priest prays for them, and they for you.

There are also memorial services that are of great importance for the dead, because their power is 10 times stronger than ordinary memorial services. These are funeral services in parents' Saturdays and on memorial Saturdays. The word "parental" has nothing to do with parents. This is the name. There are several such Saturdays a year and every year different numbers. Find out when the next parent's or memorial Saturday will be - find out in church or buy church calendar, where such Saturdays are marked with a black cross and below there is a footnote about this Saturday.

They last not 15 minutes, but the entire service! The souls of the dead come to the temple on these special Saturdays and wait for us. If we come, they rejoice and pray for us. If we don't come, they experience great sadness and devastation.

There is also another special memorial day, it falls on Radonitsa, this happens once a year - on the ninth day after Easter. After Easter, many people remember the dead exactly a week later and call it differently: “seeing off”, “coffins”. In fact, the souls of the dead come to us precisely on Radonitsa; on this day they usually visit their graves, where they are waiting for us. If we do not have the opportunity to visit the cemetery on this day, then the souls of the dead are waiting for us in the church, and they also visit us in our apartments. On this day it is necessary to pray more intensely for them, attend a memorial service in the church and think about them, they really want this on this day.

It happens that a person suddenly died. For such a person it is necessary to read a special prayer on the occasion of sudden death.

For suicides You can only pray at home; they don’t pray for them in church. Nevertheless, God is merciful and has set aside one day a year for suicides when the church is allowed to pray for suicides: this is Memorial Saturday on the eve of Trinity. On this memorial Saturday, a memorial service is celebrated for all the dead, including suicides.

Know that prayer for a suicide is a feat. Ask the priest for a blessing for home prayers for suicides, confess, take communion and begin. If your health deteriorates sharply or your child gets sick, stop praying, otherwise it will get even worse.

Give the pigeons bread and seeds for the suicides. This is the safest action for your health.

If a person is killed, then the killer takes upon himself most of the sins of the person he killed. This means that the one who was killed will not answer for many of his sins; the murderer will answer for them, plus for the sin of murder.

To sum up what has been written, I will only say that only a few go to heaven, and crowds go to hell. This is scary. In order for us and our loved ones not to end up in hell, it is necessary to live according to God's commandments. Confessing, receiving communion and unction, it is also important to properly see off the deceased on his last journey, in order to help him escape hell with his prayers and the prayers of the church.

It happens that you can beg a person for up to 40 days, and sometimes a person is in hell for 50 years, and then his relatives still beg him. Our love multiplied by the power of prayer works miracles!

P.S. Answers to the most common questions:
1. Is it commemorated on your birthday? They remember both on your birthday and on your death! But you just need to commemorate it a little earlier: a day or two before this date.

2. Is it possible to remember earlier? It’s not even possible, but they only remember it earlier. Surely you have heard that the living can be congratulated later, but the deceased should be remembered and commemorated earlier? And it is not just words.

3. How to remember on day 9? The deceased are remembered earlier, i.e. The commemoration of the 9th day of death falls on the 8th. If you have not previously ordered a magpie of commemoration from the church, then be sure to order it, and also distribute alms to the poor and needy people: food, things. Alcohol and sweets are not allowed, everything else is allowed. Giving food to birds is also suitable as alms. They gave it and said: “Remember, Lord, the soul of the servant of God (name).”

4. How to remember 40 days correctly? If you carefully read this article, you noticed that before 40 days, relatives need to read all the Psalms. Also, before 40 days in the church it was necessary to order a magpie of commemoration, usually this is done before 9 days, so that it would be easier for the soul to go through ordeals for up to 40 days and so that it would not rush around and worry about the fact that everything is about it forgot. The fact is that if we do not come to church, do not pray there for the dead, do not serve magpies and memorial services, then the soul believes that it is being ignored and forgotten. Also, within 40 days, it is necessary to hold a memorial service in the church with the sealing of the land. To do this, you need to take a handful of earth from the grave of the deceased, just don’t bring it with it! Go straight to the temple! But you must notify the priest in advance that you want to submit a memorial service within 40 days. And be sure to take groceries. What is possible and what is not is written in this article above.

5. How to commemorate an anniversary? Like all memorial days, the anniversary is commemorated earlier: a day or two earlier. Be sure to attend the funeral service at the church. The intricacies of funeral services are written in this article above. Also distribute food to the poor, give bread or cereal to the birds on the street.

And don’t forget to pray for your dead at home. All this will greatly help your loved ones whom you love and want to help.

After death, a person is remembered on the 3rd, 9th and 40th day and last date is considered the most important, since the soul comes to the Judgment and its further destiny is decided. There are many traditions associated with this day that people observe to help the deceased person on this important day.

What does 40 days after death mean?

The fortieth day of commemoration of a deceased person is considered a certain line that separates the earthly and eternal life. From a religious point of view, it is a more tragic date compared to physical death. 40 days after the funeral is a date that reminds people that the soul, after the end of earthly life, goes to its Heavenly Father. The funeral can be considered a kind of act of mercy.

Where is the soul of the deceased until 40 days?

Many people note that at first they feel the presence of a deceased person, which is manifested by smell, sighs, steps, and so on. This is due to the fact that for forty days the spirit does not leave the place where it lived.

For the first three days the soul is free and it remembers all its earthly life. It is believed that during this time she is in places that are close. On the third day after death, a memorial service must be held.
After this there will be a meeting with God, the saints and a visit to heaven. From this moment, the first torment and fears begin that due to mistakes made, the entrance to heaven may be closed. All this lasts for six days, so on the ninth day a memorial service and wake are held.
At the next stage, ordeals begin, which represent trials and obstacles. The soul will not receive a decision whether it can spend eternal life in Heaven or Hell. During this period, a comparison of positive and negative actions occurs.
When figuring out what happens on day 40, it’s worth talking about the onset of important stage – Last Judgment, where the soul can no longer influence anything and only the lived life of the deceased is taken into account.

How to pray for the deceased for up to 40 days?

Remembering dead people is the duty of every believer. According to the church, you need to pray especially diligently during the first forty days after death. A prayer for 40 days to see off the soul can be said in church or at home. If a person chooses the second option, then it is recommended that women tie a scarf on their heads and light candles in front of the image of the Lord. When figuring out the rules of 40 days after death and how to remember, it is worth noting that prayer during this period helps to gain faith in the soul and more easily cope with the loss of a loved one.

“Son of God, Lord Jesus Christ. Satisfy my heart's sorrow for the deceased slave (name of the deceased). Help me cope with this difficult loss, and give me strength to withstand the grief. And on the fortieth tribulation day, accept the soul of the deceased (name of the deceased) into the Kingdom of Heaven. And it will be so now, forever, forever and ever. Amen".

Is it possible to remember 40 days earlier?

Life is unpredictable and there is often no way to accomplish what you planned. The clergy say that if it is not possible to remember the deceased on the 40th day, it is not a tragedy or a sin, since this can be done in advance or even later. It is forbidden to reschedule commemoration at liturgy, memorial service and cemetery. Many people are still interested in how to count 40 days from the date of death, so the first day is the day of death itself, even if the death occurred late in the evening before midnight.

What is prepared for 40 days after death?

On this day, a memorial dinner is always held, the purpose of which is to remember the deceased and pray for his repose. It is important to remember that food is not the main thing, so there is no need to try to prepare a luxurious menu with big amount delicacies. A funeral dinner for 40 days, the menu of which should take into account the rules of Christianity, implies adherence to several important principles:

On the table there should be kutia, which is made from millet or rice, and pancakes without filling. Each of these dishes has its own important sacred meaning, which helps to appreciate the frailty of existence.
For those who are interested in the topic - 40 days after death, how to remember, you need to know about the ancient tradition of baking pies with different fillings.
If the forties did not fall during Lent, then meat dishes are not prohibited, so you can serve cutlets, cabbage rolls, goulash as a side dish, and so on.
Various dishes are allowed, and these can be first and second courses.
You can put salads on the table that include lean ingredients in the recipe.
Understanding the traditions of 40 days after death and how to remember the deceased, it is worth mentioning that in many families it is customary to follow the tradition of preparing the deceased’s favorite dish for a funeral dinner.
As for desserts, it is best to make cheesecakes, pies, cookies, and sweets are also allowed.

What do they take to the cemetery for 40 days?

According to traditions, on memorial days, people go to the cemetery to say goodbye to a loved one. You need to take flowers with you to the grave, of which there should be a pair, and a candle. With these objects, the living can express their respect to the deceased. You cannot talk loudly at the grave, have snacks, and especially drink alcohol. Another important point regarding what is brought to the cemetery for 40 days - as a treat for the deceased, you can take a plate of kutya from home and leave it at the grave.

What are they giving away for 40 days?

There are many traditions associated with memorial days. On the fortieth day, it is customary to distribute various treats to people so that they remember the deceased. In most cases, they give cookies, sweets and pastries. Customs for 40 days after death say that during the first forty days after death, it is necessary to distribute a person to needy people, asking them to pray for his soul. This tradition is not described in the Bible and is a personal decision for each individual.

Funeral service for 40 days – when to order?

On the fortieth day of commemoration of the deceased, you must definitely go to the temple, where you can pray and order a memorial service and magpie.

The most important prayer is said at the liturgy. During this, a bloodless sacrifice must be made to the Lord.
Seeing off the soul on the 40th day necessarily includes a memorial service and this ritual is served in front of a special table called the eve. Gifts are left there for the needs of the temple and in memory of the dead. If a memorial service is not scheduled on the day that falls, then a litany is held for the deceased.
Understanding the topic - 40 days after death, how to commemorate, it is necessary to say that it is important to order the magpie, which is carried out from the day of death until the 40th day. When the allotted time is over, the sorokoust can be repeated one more time. Longer memorial times can be ordered.

40 days after death - traditions and rituals

A huge number of customs have formed in Rus', many of which have survived to this day. There are various signs that you should not do until 40 days, but it is worth noting that many of them are fiction and the church does not confirm them. Among the well-known traditions are the following:

Since ancient times, for 40 days it is not recommended to carefully monitor your clothes and cut your hair, as this is considered a sign of disrespect for the memory of the deceased.
The table for a funeral dinner is set traditionally, but sharp cutlery, that is, knives and forks, is not used. It is customary to place spoons back side up.
Crumbs left on the table cannot be swept off the table and thrown away; they are collected and taken to the grave. This is how the living inform the deceased that a wake was taking place.
Many people are interested in the topic of what they bring to the funeral for 40 days, so there are no rules indicating such obligations, but it is not prohibited to take some home-cooked food with you, for example, pies or pancakes.
At night, it is customary to close windows and doors tightly, and one should not cry, as this can attract the soul of the deceased.
Many people leave a glass filled with vodka and covered with bread on the table or bedside table. If the liquid decreases, it means the soul is drinking it. Many people leave vodka at the grave, but Orthodox customs this has nothing to do with it.

Why can’t you chew seeds for up to 40 days?

Over the years, various customs have emerged related to the commemoration of dead people, and some of them may seem strange to many. For example, there is a ban regarding the prohibition of chewing seeds for up to 40 days, since this can spit on the soul of a deceased person. There is another explanation for this sign, according to which those who violate this prohibition will have for a long time teeth hurt. The third interpretation of superstition concerns the fact that by clicking seeds you can attract evil spirits and devils.

Why are they giving away spoons for 40 days?

Since ancient times, there has been a custom of distributing wooden spoons with which people ate at funeral dinners. IN modern world Such cutlery is not used, so ordinary spoons are distributed. The sign is explained by the fact that when a person uses such a device, he involuntarily remembers the deceased. There is another strange superstition according to which utensils used for 40 days should not be given away. It is believed that she is a participant in the farewell ritual and if a person takes her home, he will bring misfortune and even death upon himself.

Signs for 40 days after death

There are many different superstitions associated with this date from the day of death, and among them we will highlight the most famous:

During this period, it is forbidden to clean the house and turn off the lights (you can leave a night light or candle).
It is not allowed to sleep for the allotted period in the place of the deceased.
From the moment of death until 40 days, it is necessary to cover all reflective surfaces in the house: mirrors, televisions, and so on. It is believed that a dead person can be reflected in them and take a living person with them.
When holding a wake for 40 days after death, it is necessary to allocate a place at the table for the deceased person, placing a plate and a glass for him, putting a piece of bread on top.
The widow must wear it on her head for the specified time; if this is not done, then she can incur damage to herself.
Every day you need to place a glass of water and a towel on the windowsill. This is important so that the soul can wash itself.

Orthodox commemoration of the dead primarily involves prayer. And only after this is the funeral table. Of course, the funeral itself, the 9th and 40th days, are no less significant events to which all relatives, close friends, just acquaintances and colleagues from work are invited. However, at 1 year old you can not do this, but spend the day in prayer among your closest people in family circle. Also, a year after a sad event, it is customary to visit the cemetery.

How to hold a wake for 1 year?

If a person was baptized during his lifetime, he is ordered to have a funeral commemoration at the Liturgy. Prayer is huge help for people who have left this world. After all, according to by and large the deceased does not need either a monument or a luxurious meal, the only thing that can be done is close person for his soul is to read prayers and remember his good deeds.

You can order the Liturgy in the church in the evening the day before the funeral or in the morning on the same day. Among other things, the deceased is also remembered at meals. On this day, it is customary to prepare various dishes: this is necessarily soup, main course, and at the request of relatives, the favorite dishes of the deceased are prepared. Don't forget about pancakes, jelly and pastries.

On the day of commemoration of the death of the deceased, you should definitely visit his grave. If necessary, they put things in order: they paint it, plant flowers, pine needles (thuja takes root best, it does not grow in breadth and does not take root, but only grows upward). If there was a temporary monument on the grave, then it is exactly in the year after death that it is replaced with a permanent one.

Memorial meal at the wake for 1 year

Of course, the hosts want to treat the invited people tastier, but do not forget about Orthodox posts. So, if the funeral took place on the day of fasting, prohibited foods should be excluded and only those dishes that are allowed to be served should be served.

At the table it is necessary to remember the deceased, his good deeds and character traits. You should not turn the funeral table into a “drunken gathering.” After all, the word “commemoration” arose from the word “remember.”

The first dish served at the funeral table is kutia. It is boiled rice or wheat cereal with honey and raisins. While eating the dish, they think about the deceased. Such food is considered a symbol of resurrection; according to tradition, it can be sprinkled with holy water.

The following dishes on the funeral table, namely soup, main course, can be anything, depending on taste preferences the deceased or the owners. It could be regular chicken noodle soup or rich borscht, goulash with pasta or jellied meat, stuffed peppers or pilaf, as long as meat dishes are not prohibited by fasting. As a pastry, you can serve pie with filling or pancakes.

It should be noted that memorial days must be celebrated in good location spirit, be in the mood and not be offended by the deceased for leaving this world. Moreover, it is considered correct to distribute alms and clothes or other belongings of the deceased to those in need at the funeral.

Sources:

Website "Orthodoxy"

A wake is a rather complex funeral tradition found in most cultures. On the day of the funeral, there is a treat, as a memory of the deceased, both on the day of the funeral and on certain days Later.

Among some nationalities, sacrifices are laid at the grave, which are then used as food. Other customs call for holding a funeral feast (military fun) on site. This tradition was common among the Slavic and Germanic tribes, among the ancients. In other places, the deceased was seen off with mourning processions and crying.

We have a widespread Christian custom. According to the Orthodox canon, it must be carried out three times: on the day of the funeral, on the ninth day, and also on the fortieth day. They consist of a funeral meal. The same custom exists in many. The meaning of this ritual is very deep. Believing in the immortality of the soul, people bring the deceased closer to God, while at the same time paying tribute to him as good. It is not for nothing that it is customary to either speak well of the deceased or not to speak at all.

The funeral process also includes prayers for the person who has left the earthly world. In general, all actions at such rituals have a deep meaning, even the meal menu was not chosen by chance.

So how do you conduct a wake?

Before starting the meal, you must read the “Our Father” prayer. This is the necessary minimum, since it is advisable to perform a litia and sing the 90th Psalm (for this, the so-called “singers” are invited). During the wake, it is necessary to remember the deceased, and only him positive traits and actions, obscene language, laughter, jokes, and drunkenness are prohibited.

It is not advisable to make the menu rich. On the contrary, modesty and simplicity are necessary, since the abundance of dishes does not benefit the ritual process itself. The first dish that you cannot do without is the so-called kutia - porridge made from whole grain millet or rice, seasoned with honey and raisins. Moreover, it must be sprinkled with holy water, or

The anniversary of death (1 year) is a mourning date. On this day, relatives and friends of the deceased person gather to remember him. According to tradition, those gathered remember the good deeds that the deceased person managed to do during his lifetime, share their memories with each other, and express condolences to close relatives.

How to prepare

It is customary to organize a wake for a person. The funeral event is announced only to those people whom the relatives of the deceased wish to see at the funeral table. Before holding a funeral, the relatives of the deceased person must:

Notify loved ones in advance about the approaching date of mourning.
Choose an establishment (cafe or canteen) for holding a memorial service or organize a memorial table at home.
On the eve of the funeral, call the invitees again and find out who is going to come.

It is recommended to serve portioned dishes slightly larger than the stated number of guests. This is necessary if an uninvited person comes to the wake. distant relative or a colleague of the deceased. Not worth paying a lot of attention design of the room where the funeral meal will take place. It is enough to place in a prominent place a photograph of the person being commemorated, tied with a black mourning ribbon.

Funeral 1 year - important date, but don't invite too many people. It is preferable if among the invitees there are close relatives and those people whom the deceased person loved during his lifetime. But you should not refuse those who themselves have expressed a desire to attend the event (the exception is cases when a person came to the wake who clearly wants to ruin the funeral event).

Many people are interested in the question of whether it is possible to arrange a wake before the actual anniversary. The Church gives permission for this. For example, if the anniversary of the death falls on a working day of the week, then it is better to hold the funeral the day before on the weekend. Not all relatives know whether it is possible to have a funeral dinner during Lent. This is permissible provided that only lean food is present on the table.

If this option does not suit you, then it is better to organize the funeral earlier - before the start of Lent.

Visit to the church and cemetery

The Christian duty of the living is to pray for the souls of deceased relatives. Only through sincere prayers can the person being remembered be forgiven in heaven. That is why, for a year from the date of death of a person, relatives must visit the church, light candles for the repose of the soul and order special prayer- memorial service. A liturgy is served in the church, before which relatives present a note with the name of the deceased person. You should definitely visit the church in the morning. If a person visits the temple for the first time, he needs to ask the abbot about how to properly order a prayer service and light candles.

After going to the temple, relatives are advised to visit the grave of the person being commemorated, especially if it is summer outside. If a priest is invited to the grave, he can read the akathist and perform the litia. The ritual performed is also part of the commemoration, for which a person’s sins are forgiven. Relatives must pronounce good words, mentally ask for forgiveness from the deceased. It is recommended to bring fresh flowers to the cemetery. The clergy categorically prohibit bringing food, alcoholic drinks and cigarettes to the grave. It is better to bring candles and lamps to the burial site. Eating and drinking at the grave is a pagan ritual. This contributes to the spread of all kinds of garbage in the cemetery.

According to Christian traditions, the graves of the deceased must be kept clean.

In order to as much as possible more people they remembered the person by saying kind words; it is recommended to give alms a year after death. This ritual allows living people to perform a good deed, the result of which is improvement afterlife deceased. Alms are usually distributed to those who need it - poor people. Relatives can treat colleagues, friends to something tasty, or take a small funeral ration to a nursing home or Orphanage. After a year, you can give away the personal belongings of the deceased to those in need.

Funeral dinner

The table for a funeral dinner should be set modestly. It is necessary to prepare the first course, the second course, appetizers, and kutya. It is better to consecrate the Kolivo in church or sprinkle it yourself with holy water - these are the rules. It is recommended to exclude alcoholic drinks. In exceptional cases, you can put vodka, cognac or Cahors on the table. Sparkling wines would be inappropriate. If the day of the wake falls on Lent, then the table should mainly contain Lenten dishes. Any pastry is suitable as a dessert.

Many people are interested in the question of whether it is possible to make a toast. During lunch, it is appropriate for those gathered to say kind words about the deceased person. Poems, warm words in prose - this is what they say at the wake. It is acceptable to share your memories. The annual memorial dinner should not be turned into a holiday where people gossip, have fun, and utter words that denigrate the memory of the deceased person.

One year from the moment a person’s funeral took place is a very important mourning date. You should prepare for the funeral dinner in advance. However, it must be remembered that the main objective lunch and visiting the cemetery - commemorating the deceased person, praying for his soul. Don't do it just to please the people around you. If for some reason it is not possible to arrange a funeral or visit a temple or cemetery, then you can simply mentally remember the person and pray for him.